Greedy Blog

Monday, January 30, 2006


Skating with Celebrities
 
I don't find as much unintentional humor in things as Bill Simmons, but I find myself laughing all the way through Skating with Celebrities.

The best part of the show is when Summer Sanders stands next to Scott Hamilton. Hamilton is 5'3" and Sanders is 5'9". Somehow, the difference seems like 1', not 6".

Then we get the most uncomfortable banter I've seen in a long time. Scott talks for a long time, then Summer talks for a little. Good banter.

Then Scott tries to get all excited when he introduces the teams. I guess that announcing skating is his day job, but that isn't what he's doing here. He is faking hype that he doesn't believe, and it's a sight to behold. The only thing better would be if he actually announced while they were skating.

The skating itself and the judges and the Summer interviews are all boring.

Here's my breakdown of the teams:
Jillian Barbri: Easily the best skater. Very little lifted time.
Bruce Jenner: I guess this is what happens 30 years after you're the best athlete in the world. His double chin is turkey-esque. He looks like he's about the fall the entire time.
Dave Coulier: Worse than Jenner. He just kind of skates around and makes Kerrigan look bad. They may be having fun, but I'm not.
Fake Buffy: All she does is get lifted and fall. I thought she was much worse than Debbie Gibson.

BTW: A google search for ("summer sanders" height) yields 3/5 top hits as porn, including Tia Carrere and Brooke Burke porn.

Posted by Gel 9:39 PM Post a Comment

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